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- u
- R U L E S O F L I F E
- Submitted by Al Edlund
-
-
- Sometimes we need to remember WHAT
- the Rules of life really are.
-
-
- 1. Never give yourself a haircut
- after three alcoholic beverages of
- any kind. (THAT'S why everyone was
- looking at me with wierd
- expressions!)
-
- 2. You need only two tools: WD-40 and
- duct tape. If it doesn't move and
- it should, use WD-40. If it moves
- and shouldn't, use the tape. (My
- mother's motto! DMM)
-
- 3. The five most essential words for
- a healthy, vital relationship are
- "I apologize" and "You are right."
-
- 4. Everyone seems normal until you
- get to know them. ("Normal" is
- over-rated anyway. DMM)
-
- 5. When you make a mistake, make
- amends immediately. It's easier to
- eat crow while it's still warm.
-
- 6. The only really good advice that
- your mother ever gave you was: "Go!
- You might meet somebody!"
-
- 7. If he/she says that you are too
- good for him/her - believe them.
-
- 8. Learn to pick your battles. Ask
- yourself, 'Will this matter one
- year from now? How about one month?
- One week? One day?'
-
- 9. Never pass up an opportunity to
- sing.
-
- 9a. Work like you don't need the
- money. Love like you've never been
- hurt. And Sing and Dance like no
- one is around!
-
- 10. If you woke up breathing,
- congratulations! You have another
- chance!
-
- 11. Living well really is the best
- revenge. Being miserable because of
- a bad or former relationship just
- might mean that the other person
- was right about you. (Outlasting
- the stinkers is its own reward.
- DMM)
-
-
- 12. Work is good, but it's not that
- important.
-
- 13. And finally -- Be really nice to
- your friends and family. You never
- know when you are going to need
- them to empty your bedpan.
-
-
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-